Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I can count

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

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When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I can read

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I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

Why does Hollywood (except Atilla and Agora) ignore the Late Roman Empire in favour of the early one?

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

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I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

Can I bring a tub of whey protein to the airport?

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I have complete contempt for fakery

What are the most popular recruiting tools in the US?

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

What are some of your favorite hip hop lyrics?

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I actually pay taxes

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I have complete contempt for traitorism

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

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I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

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I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

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EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I don’t cotton to rapists

Is it very wrong to want to spend some time with husband after continuous work for 5 days in a weekend because my husband thinks if we go out every weekend what night my parents and other family members think?

I have a reading level above third grade

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I understand how hurricane paths work

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I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I see through liars

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I don’t buy bullshit

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

If someone works for me, I actually pay them